A Story From Days Past

Currently Listening To :: Heaven :: Bryan Adams

She picked up the phone

“Hello?” she said, a hint of happiness in her voice at his call.

“Hi there,” he said, and, as if he could feel the hint of happiness in her voice, he could not help by smile himself.

“What are you up to today? Do you still want to meet up?”

“Um…well, I’m a little busy this afternoon.”

His heart fell. How could he have been so stupid? While they had agreed to maybe do something that day, there had been no concrete plans, no commitment to time nor to place. How could he have just expected her to be waiting by the phone for him to call?

“Oh…” he said back, trying to fight the disappointment in his voice. “What are you up to today?”

“I’m just about to head out to lunch with a friend and go shopping for a new swimsuit, so I probably won’t be back until tonight.”

A friend. He hated it every time she said that. Who was this friend? One of her many male friends? A suitor perhaps? Again he cursed his arrogance at playing the situation too coolly.

“But we can still meet up after dinner if you want. I mean, I know it’s Monday tomorrow, but if you want…”

“Sure!” he replied, perhaps a bit too quickly for his own liking. But he was so happy that she’d given him the option; her willingness to still meet up meant that she wasn’t averse to seeing him again, and that gave him hope.

“We can just meet up and have a drink after dinner?”

“Sounds good to me. Okay you, I’ll give you a call later on tonight okay?”

Goodbyes were exchanged. Hanging up, he began to think about where they could go, what they could do on a Sunday night. It wasn’t until a few minutes later that he realized that he had no other plans for the day, so sure of himself that she’d be right there waiting for him to call and make the plans.

Shaking his head again, the words “Don’t feel sorry for yourself. Only arseholes do that,” came to mind. Pausing a moment, he began to feel better. Putting down the phone and picking up his book, he tried to leave the images of her in her new swimsuit behind and re-immerse himself in the words and metaphors of another.

And just like that, all was right in the world again. Tenuous as this balance was, he knew he couldn’t help but live in the moment. Knowing this could not last, yet not wise enough to manage his own expectations, he closed his eyes tight and hoped against hope…